Hey Babes! So you have begun making your guest list for your wedding or sending out Save the Dates or planning your bridal showers….and you are starting to feel pressure to add certain people to your guest list. Been there! I’ve had others invite people to my wedding…without my permission… or people assume they are invited to my wedding. This situation is inevitable for every bride because people may chime in their opinion on who should be invited to your big day. At the end of the day, it is up to YOU and your significant other who is invited to your wedding! We are here to help you decide and address any pressure you may be having to invite people to your wedding.
Set Your Guest List Number
Even if you have abig budget for your wedding, you still need to set a guest list number for thebig day. You need to set this number before securing a venue, and your guestlist affects every part of your wedding (seating, food, party favors, etc). Onceyou set this guest list number, it is a way of directing people if they suggestto invite someone. I’ve told several people “We are only inviting closefriends/family due to our budget and venue capacity.” Most people areunderstanding of this reason!
It’s Okay to Say No
As a person who lovesto please others, it can be hard to tell people no when it comes to yourwedding. I would never want to hurt a person’s feelings, but the reality is youcannot invite everyone you know to your wedding. Again even if you have abigger budget for your wedding, it’s just unrealistic to invite EVERYONE. And in my opinion, not everyone deserves toattend your wedding. Your guest list should take some thought andconsideration, and for my fiancé and I, we agreed to invite people who support,love and cherish our relationship.
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I want my day to remembered as a celebrationwith all of our loved ones and people who will put in the effort to celebrateas well. We all know those people who justcome for a free meal then leave….
Some potential guestsneed more thought than others, so if you need time to think about your decisionthen do so! But remember it is okay to say NO. Every guest will cost money, andyou deserve to have people who appreciate your marriage to attend your wedding.
Be Polite but Assertive
When saying “no” toadding a guest to your wedding list, you can do so in an assertive and politeway. Assertiveness means confidently voicing your opinion in a respectful manner.If you allow a few guests to slip in, then others may feel they can do thesame. Use your communication skills to explain to the person the reason youwill not be inviting them/their desired guest. You should not feel obligated toinvite someone.
It’s Okay to Give an Honest Reason
This might be the hardestpart of addressing the pressure of your guest list. Whether you have to tell aco-worker if you invite them you feel the need to invite the entire office ortelling a person they are not invited due to their relationship with someone atthe wedding is just the honest truth. Tread lightly on this step because youdon’t want to seem rude or standoffish. My fiancé was put in a similar positionbecause he knew if he invited one of his friends from high school he would needto invite several others in order to be fair. If the reason doesn’t cause moreconflict, you can address it with the person. Again, use open and clearcommunication and be polite.